Pearl Jam, Verizon Center, Washington D.C.

If you don't know by now, you will never ever ever know me and my enjoyment of the music of Pearl Jam.

Tonight's show seemed a bit flat to me, especially in the first set. Eddie Vedder did not put the normal amount of energy into his singing, though the rest of the band was tight. One of the poorer performances was "Once" with Eddie appearing to have difficulty mustering the fortitude for the higher, screaming notes. However, the next set proved that Vedder hadn't lost his vocal chops. Highlights of set one: "Life Wasted," "Do the Evolution," "Corduroy," and "I Got Id."

The second set began strangely, with the band seated on-stage. "Man of the Hour" proved a good track for this set up, but the version of "Betterman" featured the rarity of an off-key Vedder having difficulty matching up with the sparse keyboarding of the Hawaiian dude (don't know his name, sorry). However, there were some great gems, including a fantastic, lumbering version of "Masters of War."

As always, they ended with "Yellow Ledbetter," that continues to give me goosebumps with the first E note plucked.

A great show...

One note, on the Metro train ride back to my car, parked in Silver Spring, talked to two young Catholics who live in Catonsville. It was an odd conversation about Christianity and JPII (John Paul the second for those not initiated in the universal church lingo) that was a bit uncomfortable for me. Friendly people, though.

Brief Post

Few random things:

• Went to PA for Kid W's wedding. Beautiful place, wonderful wedding, great time. Congrats.
• Saw X-Men 3...one hint that I did not take advantage. Sit through the credits since there's a 30 second scene after the end credits that seems to be quite important to the story lines.
• If you live near the Christana Mall in Delware, go quickly, for the Lord and Taylors is having a huge, closeout sale from 40-70% off. They're shutting down the department store. Great bargains.

Great American Speeches, Volume 1

SC-Span coverage of President Bush's address to the National Restaurant Association.
May 22, 2006 (News story available as Yahoo!)

President Bush: Hello. Thank you. Heh. Yeah, so good to be in Chicago, especially with those Cubbies doing so well. Heck, almost like watching the Rangers when I owned them (polite laughter).

Thanks for having me here. Always a pleasure to speak in Illinois. Love this facility you got here, the McCormick Place. I'm a big fan of this place, and this city, a fine patriotic American city (applause). Shares the name of that fella who acts on that "Will and Grace" (unsure laughter) which is a funny program.

Stan Humphries, the head of your organization, asked me to come down and speak to you here today, and I told everyone in my office to clear my schedule so that I could be present at this engagement (applause). Heck, Stan ain't a fellow to mince words, catch my drift (laughter and whistles). Almost union-like (laughter) So, here I am, and I want to really get down to some important matters that need to be addressed. No, the most important matter. I promise to keep this short so that we can get back to enjoying these fine steaks y'all got here (mummered approval).

Now, when I thought about what to speak on, I thought to myself, "What do restauranteurs need to know about our current situation over there in Iraq?" Now I know, we could be talking about things that seem more important, like lifting the tariffs on steak tartarre or making illegals more present here for your kitchen help (raucous cheers). Heck, now, I'm not really go into that today.

What I want you to know is that freedom is strong today. That freedom gives us the liberty to enjoy the fruits of our labor. That means you and I can enjoy delicious food and drink because of the sacrifices we must make to ensure our ability to live in a manner accustomed to Americans. By that, I mean, freely (applause). The freedom to really dig down deep into a pile of barbeque or to enjoy some home fries without worries of the next disaster wrought upon us by those who cannot abide by freedom. Food is freedom, and those who hate freedom, they hate food (raucous cheers).

Listen, you can let them out there scare you into thinking that America is in jeopardy, that we're losing. That's not true. Sure, I can understand why people are concerned about whether or not our strategy can succeed because our progress is incremental. But really, trust your president, cause who else knows better (cheers) because freedom is moving but it's in incremental steps, and the enemy's progress is almost instant on their TV screens. So you see, there's no buts about it, we're winning and the terrorists who hate our freedom are losing (cheers and clinking of crystal wine goblets). It doesn't make much difference if you hate freedom, cause you're gonna lose (deflated applause).

Incrementally, we've gained positions that are integral to our support and transfer protocol. Incrementally, our troops have attained the necessary weaponery and armor to get the job done and get home safely to the loving arms of their freedom loving families. Incrementally, we've succeeded in establishing a country that loves freedom and much as we cherish liberty on our home soil. Incrementally, we have made the mother country safer from those who seek to use terror to cause us to tremble and falter in our steps to secure our ways of life. Incrementally, we've put the right people in position to ensure a more better world situation for us. Incrementally, the rewards of such necessary actions are at hand, and incrementally, we have come toward completing a total turnaround of the disaster that some of those out there want to say almost did happen. That's not freedom (applause). That's not my idea of America.

So, you see, the progress we've made has been hard-fought, and it's been incremental. There have been setbacks and missteps, like Abu Ghraib or Valerie Plume or a few other things that didn't go according to plan, that were felt immediately and have been difficult to overcome. Yet we have now reached a turning point in the struggle between freedom and terror (applause). Its not so easy when you have power, so when things go right, you know that freedom and liberty are on your side while terror took the back door out to the caves that they have to hide in. Incrementally, we're flushing them out, and we'll see the day someday.

Now, see, we fight the enemy with a conviction that is stronger than fear. The terrorists fought this moment with all their hateful power, with suicide attacks and beheadings and roadside bombs. We fought with peace and love and all things that are good and inspiring, drawn from the wellspring of liberty that exists within our God-fearing hearts. They fought all that good energy, and they rued the day that right defeated fearful might. We could have turned tails in flight, but look at us, now the day they feared has arrived. And with it's come a moment of great clarity: The terrorists can kill the innocent, but they cannot stop the advance of freedom (applause). Freedom is too, too free to really stop, and they know that now.

So, here's where I'm going to end. I'm here to tell you this. I want everything better, sure I do. I want us all to live in a world that is incrementally better, and I'm going to incrementally improve everything around us, including freedom, before I'm done here. We've got to stay the course; it's important to stick to the fight because the terrorists are determined to kill innocent life. Those aren't my words, but that Al-Quida guy. We'll eventually leave that country, and bring our boys home, but not before the fight is done and a new nation of democracy rises from the ashes of tyranny and terror. So, now, I'll withdraw from this dais so that you can get back to your steaks. God bless America. God bless Chicago. God bless the Restaurant group. Thank you.

(standing ovation)

Chef in white hat: Another round of applause for our president (applause). On behalf of all the cooks and chefs in our country, I'd like to thank you, Mr. President for creating jobs in the restaurant industry and running the country the way a chef would run the country.


------

Can you identify the parts that are real from the parts that are made up?

The JEFF photo gallery

A few Jeff pictures from France:



Tux, pre wedding
















Much too close for comfort














Hook hand in the Battle of the Lettuce

And they asked for more music...

Here's another brief summary of music that seems to rattle around in my head like stubborn pool water in the ear canal. Hop up and down, its all for naught:

• Mos Def: You know that Blackstar album? Remember how good the flow was from Mr. Def and his cohort, Talib Kweli? Well, I've always had a profound enjoyment of Def's vocal stylings; he effectively utilizes the lower register of his bass as he rips through some damn good lyrics. Some favorites, for some reason, "Ooooh! no limit to what I would do /
  Make love to you like long interview" or "Not strong, only aggressive, cause the power aint directed / Thats why, we are subjected to the will of the oppressive." Anyway, listening to Black on Both Sides as well as liberal dose of Blackstar.
  
• Tegan and Sara So Jealous : Not bad, like a modern variation of Indigo Girls. Sure, they're angsty girls, but they write such good pop songs and they have some semblance of harmony. Definitely not Amy Ray and Emily during their primes, but decent. Highlight track for me: "I Know I Know I Know."
• The Sea and Cake Oui : You know, this is another old album, but I can't decide whether I like this album because its laid back and good background music, or if I should hate it for being so pleasant as to fade to the background. Would you consider music to be "great" if it is so unremarkable as to fall behind into the setting of your consciousness? Think of this: all those TV shows ending with the latest pop track that is chomping at the bit to become a tie-in hit, one of the problems is that sometimes these songs distract from the scene that is unfolding before our eyes. Sure, the song failed as far as part of the visual composition, but maybe you're distracted because its a damn good song. Sometimes, songs are just perfect, and that perfection shines on the scene (see Life Aquatic's use of Sigur Ros). However, most of the time, music on these shows/movies fall to the background because that is their role...to provide a sonic background to the action kinetically blossuming before our eyes. Thus, my contention is that pleasant music that you have on while you are balancing your checkbook is not "great" or even "good," rather it should be considered merely digestible. So, my assessment of Sea and Cake: its like a cut from a light, fluffy pastry which shines with lemon zest and delicate sweetness.
• Michael Stipe In the Sun : a song sung with Chris Martin and/or Joseph Arthur, as well as four other versions of the same song with contributions from James Iha, Justin Timberlake, and will.i.am. For a good cause (hurricane relief), but hearing this song reminded me that Stipe is really obsessed with the sun (or lack there of). I mean, I know, its one of the easiest symbols to use for metaphoric purposes, but come on, "Around the Sun," or waking up ("The Wake Up Bomb" "Daysleeper"), or shiny ("Shiny Happy People")...you know, upon reviewing Allmusic.com, R.E.M. doesn't have too many song titles with sunlight. However, as a longtime fan, I know that the lyrics are rife with mentions of the heavenly orb...thus, I have no point, and will move on. Now.

A friend of mine is really into Juana Molina, and you can check out some of here songs here.
Really chill, pretty good. But then again, see review of Sea and Cake.

Congestion, Insomnia, Insecurity...

Really? You want to talk about that?

About the time we kissed on the Ferris Wheel, I apologize but I did warn you about my fear of heights. It is unseemly to want to dredge up the past so I understand your reticence as we talk, that old way that your voice trills up at the end of sentences, especially those words with hard consonants and long vowels. I'm gonna make this easy for you.

Why'd you call after all this time? What did you want for me to say? That, surely not just that.

Yeah, yeah. All is well, I'm happy, sounds like you're happy, we should catch up sometime, ok bye bye.

Well, yes. I suppose that is what you want, isn't it?

Oh, now, stop sobbing. Unseemly, the way you dip so easily into your old bag of emotional distress, tossing around the pity card as if you were truly downtrodden. I can't believe I can still read your mind; I figured five years would have clouded the view into your twisted little mind.

Yes, I'm still angry. Why wouldn't I be? I mean, I am justified in my immediate defensiveness, since your perogative is usually to wound me in whatever capacity that you can get your grubby little insecurity latched upon. Pitch perfect, you swing your voice determined to crash it against any spot with a bit of purchase.

Yes, I suppose you are a monster.

You never could take the truth, could you? Intellectualize it any way you want, baby. Justifications about your younger self, maybe it was this, maybe it was that time with the little girl who humiliated you. Maybe it was my fault, all of it, then would you be at ease, which is the only goal any of us who loved you ever possessed.

Yeah, you're right, only is an incorrect word.

Yes, yes, so there were ulterior motives, you and me and she and she and she. It really doesn't matter at this point, does it?

Hello?

Alright, look, I really have to go. Maybe some day we can have this talk and be friends, right?

Really, I have to go.

Alright, take care, bye bye.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Before you think that was something that happened tonight or any night, it wasn't. I just started writing the Ferris Wheel line and it came out. I think it was all the voices that I have heard on the other end of the line when I do the occasional "what does it all mean" routine in my mind from "High Fidelity."

You know, I feel like a sham sometimes. I mean, look at me, I'm not that great at anything, and yet I'm in a decent position to be a relative success in life. I'm upwardly mobile, which is a good thing in this world of dollar signs and emotional stability, and I'm set to take this glass elevator though the ceiling. Why am I mired in a feeling that this is all going to end? I can't shake the feeling that I need to ruin this soon in order to get to the core of myself: I'm a failure.

Look at this, I need to flog my insecurities on a blog. I guess this makes me feel special.

The biggest problem is my feelings toward Lady E. She's special, one of a kind, and she wants little old me. I need to give her the world, rather than this humdrum ordinary misanthrope boyfriend that she comes home to every night. I somehow feel like I'm not enough, that I need to give her more of myself, which I'm shocked to find is not there. I don't have enough energy right now to want to get out of bed right now, let alone shrug my shoulders and lift up her world. But I should! That's the long and the short of it.

ELV: I love you. I really do. I hope this weak old man is enough.

To the world: I guess it takes a certain amount of egotism to drive a man to air out his mental malaise to an indifferent world. Take pity on me, cause that's what insecurity demands.

If I post this, I'm an idiot.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I guess I should finish this with some words of encouragement:

• Day 2 of cigarette quit: had one slide back, but in general surly from lack of toxins. Coughing up all sorts of crap. Hasn't helped the allergies and cold plus ear infection. Not only is internet my therapist, but its also my medical testimonial.
• Cooked up heart healthy meal (homemade gnocci with herbs w/o butter, bean salad with cucumber, pan seared portobello, and steamed broccoli...dessert was a tropical fruit sorbet).
• I'm headed to Second City in Chicago with KidW for comedy writing/improv acting class in July. Will be a wonderfulic adventure...with mini scones, baby.
• Baltimore teaching hunt is on...any leads on any high paying, low effort jobs in the baltimore area are much appreciated.
• Why are there so many good TV shows? I never have time to watch all the modern masterpieces that are airing on the boob tube. Bastards.
• To ELV, thanks for the chicken soup...
• Finally, standardchuck maxim #28: never allow asians to write long blog entries when coming off chemical addictions while fighting sinus infections because the results are downright unreliable, much like the performance of an iPod, in entertainment value. I mean, come on, is it that difficult to come up with a music player that doesn't lock up every hour? Freakin' reboot...I'd like to reboot my nano against Steve Jobs' smirking face.

I digress...I'm quitting.

Outside the Senator Theater

Working Blue in a Mazda Protege

A poem from an uninflated airbed

Shifting, replaced
Everything will change.
I toss in my sheet
to the snores of Tim(e)


Many things to report about (if I am able, my mind is as murky as South Philly diner coffee):

• Bachelor Throwdown - Of note, for my memory banks: some people think that a Pabst Blue Ribbon escorted by a shot glass of whiskey-ish liquid is a great conduit to funkytown; nothing less sexy than a girl turning 21 who really wants to get laid; Pabst Blue Ribbon sucks; paintballs whizzing by your head as you lay in cold muck is a good time until someone takes aim at your left ass cheek...scratch that, still fun; take a look at the bachelor-to-be featured in the photo to your right...see where his fingers are...what's up with that dude in the background? I don't know him or his career aspirations, but I definitely know that there would be mutual hatred, especially if we were on the same crew of a seafaring vessel. He would totally shirk his duties for rousing matches of shuffleboard with Dead-Eye Juan the toothless third mate; had a great time with everyone...good group of young up-and-comers. Best wishes to the groom.
• Racism - A quick note to the waitress who worked at the Iron Pig or whatever pub we ate at in Philly, but I'm sorry miss, I don't know what I did to offend you (though several theories offered up involved the Vietnam War and Pokemon), but it is not excusable for my finished plate to sit on the table while everyone else has a cleared spot, especially since I finished first, and it should never take 3 order attempts to attain a glass of Yuengling. The white brethren that broke bread with me did not have similar issues with the hired help. A pox on you, and pikachu...wench.
• Gambling - I'm sorry, but I feel like a cad for winning 11 dollars at the poker tables vs. 300 at slots.
  
• Quitting - I'm approaching a decade of defiling my lungs...so, starting today, I'm quitting. Sorry, Phillip Morris, I think I'm gonna have to pass up, and not away, on your product. Why, you may ask?

1. I'm tired of smelling like the way Nick Nolte looked in his delicious mugshot.
2. Four dollars for 20 sticks: 9.75 at Atlantic City. I'll be able to afford the future artificial lungs if I start saving now.
3. I hear everything tastes and smells better when you have a functioning respiratory system.
4. I want to run through a field of daisies without gagging on a tar wad.
5. I want to be able to run...as well as climb stairs, walk up a hill, come down a mountain, play basketball, swim, etc without passing out.
6. I don't want to be so dependent on carbon monoxide to help me deal with my oral fixation. Lollipops will suffice, and they taste so heavenly!
7. No more upholstery burns.
8. Legitimate disregard for requests from bummers on the street (buy your own packs, you good for nothing, so-and-so's, I curse your names).
9. The ability to enjoy trans-continental flights without ranting about the damned lungs of fellow passengers (though how hard could it really be to have a filtration system in a compartment somewhere on the plane? Just a small cubicle with a freaking fan for the smoking impaired! Come on, United, nicotine withdrawal isn't the way to fly the friendly skies.).
10. All those precious minutes that I won't be puffing away...meaning I get to possible enjoy all the wonderful minutiae of the elderly years. Hooray incontinence.
11. Won't have to wash so frequently (look out, semi-monthly showers)
12. I'll hate smoke, thus reducing appearances at bars and other smoking establishments, meaning my liver will have a chance to recover from PBR and whiskey "value meals."
    
13. The ability to judge smokers as "weak" and "disgusting," which will allow me to feel good about myself, cause I'm so darned awesome.
14. I'll feel healthy for the first time in about a decade.

• Weight-Loss - Alright, I'm on a real diet, which is going to make me doubly irritable. The foodie in me laments with pearly tears for all the flavor that I'm going to be absent from the palate. However, enough is enough. Tonight, the scale (making a triumphant return to guilt me into serious action) tipped out at 210, which is the most I have ever weighed. That means, in the last year, I've gained 20 pounds. So, until I can bend over again without a pain in the gut, enough with lousy food and immobility. I will be healthy again, darn it, unless I face-plant while jogging, then I'll just be a handsome, overweight corpse. Think fondly of me, America.

Well, that's that, mattress man. I've got to rest for them. They are our future.

In Christopher Walken's name...

Since Blogger is being difficult (for some reason I can't post pictures right now...got to get a FTP or something), go to this website for pics from Paris. Michael's a good man, he'll understand the additionally web-traffic.

http://michaelthoover.com/

What up, lately?

I've been writing the French Saga (as I've affectionately named the cycle of stories to describe the France voyage), so for the few who await with scarcely-abaited breath, they're coming.

Since I've been back, several occurances to note:

• The Flower Market: Baltimore has an annual appreciation for all things floral. In addition to eating some food (excellent kettle corn), EV and I viewed a performance of the Baltimore City Improv group...assessment: dull with a dash of suckage. There's an artful method to improv comedy where the randomness of lawless over-acting intersects with the eureka moment of inspiration to build into a sublime moment of hilarity. The wrong way includes picking an absolutely unfunny tangent to the improv game structure and then running that premise into the ground - the rest of the group unwilling or unable to rescue the drowning. Additionally, poop, vomit, and piss is not funny just by itself: embellish the hell out of it. The Aristocrats is not funny unless you do the unexpected with the usual materials - Jeff's description of a woman defecating a flower is funnier than anything I could ever say.
• Been going crazy trying to finish the academic year off strong: field trips, experiments, dissections, and race wars are making it difficult times for Chuck to find time to write.
• Music Mania: downloading a lot from pay sites...here's the cream of the crop (in no particular order)

1. The Flaming Lips: Clouds Taste Metallic - Been meaning to get some older Flaming Lips (my collection stops at The Soft Bulletin except for a few singles like Bad Days, She Don't Use Jelly, and random tracks from Zaireeka). I got the new Lips first (the tepid At War With the Mystics), and being rather unimpressed, I got Clouds after reading a favorable review from Allmusic.com. Great album; tight, inspired insanity that really melds the experimentation of the band with solid melodic construction. Highlights for me: "Evil Will Prevail," "Brainville," and "When You Smile" which could have been transposed to Soft Bulletin.
2. Field Music: Field Music - I really like a random song downloaded from Myoldkentuckyblog.com, which is titled "I'm Tired." Mixes the sweetness of Of Montreal and Belle and Sebastian, with the syncopation found in Death Cab/Postal Service. It's good pop music with enough meat to prevent aural indigestion.
   
3. Built to Spill: You In Reverse - If you love Built to Spill, get this album. If you have not heard of Built to Spill, get this album then go to a show (they're on tour to support the album). Highlights for me: The first three songs and the last three songs.
4. Pearl Jam: Pearl Jam - Finally, a return to rock. Pearl Jam has departed (hopefully not for a temporary detour) from the downward spiral to irrelevance to make a solid rock album. I'm excited to go to the show in D.C. It has been a while, but this is a solid descendent of the Vitalogy era barn-burners (and thankfully sans "Stupid Mop.").
5. David Bowie: Heroes - A highlight of the Bowie/Eno collaboration, the album has a few great songs with vocals ("Heroes," "Secret Life of Arabia" and "Sons of the Silent Age"... the latter a Great White Duke classic slightly slurred from a few too many puffs from Marrakesh opium) and great soundscapes. Good stuff for fans of experimental music that are pleasant to listen to...this could lead to a tangent about so-called art music that are either minimalistic toward boredom or completely devoid of melody that it might as well be white noise...but I digress.
6. Gnarls Barkley: St. Elsewhere - I'm sure I'm going to hate the "Crazy" song in a few weeks when it blows up on the pop charts, but right now, its a little slice of musical heaven. A mixture of great soulful singing and solid composition, with a killer hook, the song rocks it out. It makes the dance-phobic in me cringe as I boogie-bop in the driver's seat. The rest of the album ranges from decent to pretty damned good (including "Just a Thought," deploying the breakbeats of Danger Mouse so craftfully deployed on the White Album mashup, "Transformer" which is like Outkast on Ritalin, and the downbeat of "St. Elsewhere.") Great freakin' album, and I'm glad I got it just before it explodes and becomes a mess all over the radio and television.
7. Ghostface Killah: Fishscale - Intense and funny. Ghostface has always been tight lyrically, but this album returns him to the level of Supreme Clientele. This is a great album to get back in touch with Wu-tang Killah Bees!!! One of the best tracks on the album is "Whip You With a Strap" which is a story about getting beat by his mother: poignant and a bit chilling, but I end up truly feeling, which is a rarity in boastful artifice that is modern hip-hop. Get this album.

I'll be back with more soon, kiddies. I leave with fat man, redux.

Since returning...

The trip will be recounted in a series of five short stories. I'm working on one now.

One picture...man enjoying the sun outside Gare de L'Est (East Train Station in Paris)