Best of 2006, continued

Best Albums of the Year - "Orphans" by Tom Waits; "Fishscale" by Ghostface Killah; and "I Am Not Afraid Of You and I Will Beat Your Ass," by Yo La Tengo. I was going to post a review of each, but I'm feeling rather lazy, so I'll simply tell you that the second disc of "Orphans" is beautiful, Ghostface Killah's record (and the sequel album "More Fish") demonstrate his assention to the title of best Wu Tang rapper, while pretty much any Yo La Tengo album will satisfy my soul.

Oddest/Oddly Funny Political Ad of 2006 - "Puppies" by the Steele campaign (MD). Really, folks, when you can make the claim that someone is going to attack your stance on puppies, you know you've hit rock bottom in muckraking. So, in this ad, Steele presupposes that the other side is going to say he doesn't like puppies. You see that? He beat them to the punch, much like B. Rabbit in that MC battle, yo.

Best Website With the Best Photos of the Year - TIME: The Best Photos of the Year. The shot of Beirut mirroring WTC, the charred imprint of a body in Sudan, and the Marines in their makeshift camp in Iraq...stirring images from some of the best photographers.

Best Reason to Run Out and Buy a Behemoth-mobile - Bob Lutz (vice-chairman of GM). Lutz, a long-time critic of government fuel economy regulations, compared the attempt to force carmakers to sell smaller vehicles to "fighting the nation's obesity problem by forcing clothing manufacturers to sell garments only in small sizes." Don't you know, people, fat people deserve, nay require, fat cars!

Best Film That Teaches You the Brilliance of Andy Kaufman, Satire, and Jackass - Borat. Funny movie, but really just an amalgamation of Latka's naivity and avant-comedy with Sacha Baron Cohen's razor sharp satirical eye with a healthy dollop of Steve-O jackassery.

Best Return to Form By a Cinematic Master - Martin Scorsese for "The Departed." He took a popcorn action flick (albeit a great one in Infernal Affairs) and upped the anty with breakneck virtuosity. A clastrophobic, fast paced character study that demanded and attained great performances by Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Jack Nicholson. Funny how Donnie Wahlberg comes in and steals the movie though.

Best Reason to Punch a Director - The Science of Sleep. Such a precious little trifle, it made me want to sock Michel Gondry in the face. Stick to directing movies by great writers like Charlie Kaufman, otherwise its off to the Hello Kitty factory for you.

continued.

The Best of 2006

Another year begins anew here in Baltimore, announced with the hearty shelling in the inner harbor, followed by a litany of sirens of police and fire engines: 2007 arriving with a bang and buzz. Of course, in my champagne induced haze, I started thinking about the events of 2006 and decided to order them in the time honored tradition of a Best Of list.

• Best American Waste of Time: (tie) The Iraq War and Web 2.0. The discontent of Americans toward the continuing conflict in Iraq has reached an all time high, what with unending sectarian violence, loss of US troop life, and the quagmire of American political leadership. Yet, the reason why I tie the war and the insipid hoopla over user-submitted internet content is the frustrating aspect of oversaturation. Turn on any political show (both left and right) and you'll hear the latest in Iraq. Meanwhile, get any neat little viral video and you'll have the punchline blaring out on Sportscenter. Watch the Daily Show, Fox News, or Katie Couric looks cute news hour and you'll see that President Bush is in "listening mode" about the Iraq conflict. Watch T.V. or read a magazine and you'll hear something about the totally rad blogosphere. Enough already. Politically, whatever we do in Iraq is going to be unpopular and too-little-too-late, while as soon as the Web 2.0 celebration dies down as the technology is less feted (really, do we need another video diary from a 15 year old talking about how meanness sucks), the better.
  
• Best Knee Jerk Reaction: The Democrats Reclaiming Congress. Grumble, grumble...we're all tired of the Republicans. So, what do we do, as Americans with a grudge? We vote out the pachyderms and vote in the jackasses. Yeah! Time to celebrate...but wait, here's the problem. First off, the American populance didn't really shift their political ideology from the base conservative thoughts to that of liberal logic. The vote of 2006 was a reflection of the disgust that the citizens who actually voted held against the war in Iraq and the rampant corruption in the national government. Second, the mandate for the Democrats was actually only 52% of the general election voters. Hopefully, the Dems don't make the same mistake of the Bush Republicans as seeing an election result as manifest destiny from the wholesale installation of Democrat legistation during the next two-four years. Rather, this needs to be a legislation session with two goals - 1> Don't get caught with your hand in the cookie jar (keep squeeky clean) and 2> mend some of the damage of partisanship and make some friendly connection with those basta...I mean, leaders of the grand old party.
• Best Reason Not To Feel Hopeful About America - The 2006 Elections. Here's the ballot initiatives that came up for vote in the U.S.A. in 2006 that have me a bit glum... 7 out of 8 states passed initiatives to ban same sex marriages (is that really necessary Colorado, Idaho, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Virginia, and Wisconsin?); Michigan passed an initiative banning affirmative action (cause those darn minorities have so many advantages); a referendum failed in Massachusetts to relax wine sales...really, do we need to make it hard to buy wine; Marie Steichen of South Dakota won an election for Jerauld County commisioner despite dying two months before the election; and this gem from Wikipedia - Millions of allegedly harassing and deceptive "robo-calls" were reported or placed in at least 53 house districts. The vast majority of the calls were reported to begin with the message "Hello, I’m calling with information about (Democratic candidate)" and continue with a negative message concerning the candidate. Regulatory statements concerning the sponsor of the message (usually the NRCC) allegedly did not come until after the message, instead of before, as the FCC mandates. Citizens reported receiving calls several times an hour and as late as 2:30 AM, and many held the mistaken belief that the calls were from Democratic campaigns. How's that for fair and balanced, eh?
• Best Quote From a Supreme Court Justice About the Environment, or Al Gore is a Chump - Justice Scalia. "Troposphere, whatever. I told you before I'm not a scientist. That's why I don't want to have to deal with global warming."
• Best Reason to Lose One's Life - The Playstation 3. Peyton Brooks Strickland (18) was shot and killed as he was served with a search warrant at his campus apartment in Wilimington, North Carolina, USA on Friday. Strickland was allegedly involved in the assault of University of North Carolina Wilmington (UNCW) student Justin Raines (20) during the theft of two new PS3 units. From Spong news.

More coming.

new post

there's alot to report, but i injured my right pinky and typing is difficult. therefore, new post coming in the 07. peace be with you all.

The specialness that is me

Don't you hate Web 2.0? Sure, we give ourselves a pat on the back, winning the Time cover for persons of the year, but really, what are WE really? We are a collective of individuals with our own interests and hobbies and thoughts and persuasions that are really only interesting in diverting, non-important manners. For instance, what's the hottest application that's the pointy end of the mighty 2.0 spear? YouTube...where you'll find incredibly stupid hot people doing webblogs, insanely idiotic people running into walls, and totally outrageous pet behavior. Sure, I enjoy perusing images of humping dog USB drives, but honestly, how is that more incredible than any other time waster that we have invented?

The main target of this rant, though, is for MySpace and all those other social networking sites. Here's a for instance: my friend sent me a link to his MySpace homespace space. I click on the link to see a picture of me buddy, mugging away. Fun. Below, we've got all these interesting factoids about my friend. Did you know that his personal quote involves some inane line from "Office Space?" Did you know that he likes every band that has released an album that got the cover of College Music Journal? Did you know that he's actually read a book?

Hint: for those of you who really want to met other kindred spirits, type in favorites that are on the tail end of the long tail. There's really nothing special about liking Coldplay and Radiohead. Now, if you were to say that you like Ambergris, someone might come along and find another Ambergris fan out in the ether and try to hump you.

Now, on top of finding out interesting facts about my friend (wow, he really liked Pirates of the Carribean, that explains why he named his dog Sparrow), I can read his blog postings (ex. mood=happy! I can't believe she drank the whole thing!!! ROFL! smiley emoticon) and see who he's friends with (wow, 300+ friends, including Nabokov, Colonel Sanders, and the great state of Pennsylvania!). Not really all that much to bitch about...

Holy crap. Below the listing of friends like notches upon the belt is a message board system filled with the most inane ridiculousness this side of not knowing the context. Really, I was dumbfounded by the possible meanings of some posts such as "Dude, where's the bacon," and "Give a cripple crab a crutch." Honestly, this is the cyber variation of writing notes in homeroom. The entire hoopla of the importance of Web 2.0 and the genius of us lies in simply translating the banal conventions of society into handle user interfaces on the computer. "You mean I get to write about all that's important to me, and I get to chat with my buddies...all from one page?!! Then I can link it up to that video I shot with my cell phone camera of that hottie vomiting outside Power Plant Live." Yes, we've basically taken every stupid conversation that can be overheard at a party and displayed it for all the world to see.

So, as much as I enjoy all the applications of Web 2.0, it still isn't something that we should all be proud of...love, a dude writing something on a blog (hello irony).

Best of noculture

I belong to this group of friends who always seem to find interesting things on the web. Not checking the site for a few days, I find that the blog is chock full of neat items. Here's a sampling.

The Hoff is back. David Hasselhoff's "Jump In My Car."

Nasty. Doll Devotees.

Turkish Airlines sacrifices a camel.

The Japanese have finally done it. A Humping Dog USB device. Finally.

Overheard/Overseen

At a holiday party, a group of three girls:
Girl 1- I cooked this really delicious meal for him.
Girl 2- What did you make?
Girl 1- Get this, so I took a bowl and sprayed butter spray...
Girl 3- Like I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
Girl 1- Yeah, its just as good.
...
Girl 1- So I took some romaine lettuce, some spices and stuff, and added Swanson chicken, which is this precooked chicken that you can find in the frozen food section.
Girl 2-I've never heard of that.
Girl 1-Yeah, we'll its so much easier to cook than normal chicken.
...
Girl 1- So I combine all this stuff, and stick it in the microwave, and it turns out really good.
Girl 3- That sounds yummy.
Girl 1- Yeah, but he was like this isn't that good, and I'm like, what an asshole!

I'm serious, these gourmand were really discussing the magic of microwave chicken.

Girl 1 also contributed this bon mot: "...so the gym called and was like YOU HAVE TO COME IN and I was like, I've got to go."

What does any of this mean?

...

Last night at poker, Billy Mac decided to make pictograms using poker chips. He made a smiley face, his luck went a bit bad, so he made an unhappy face. However, a stroke of brilliance...he made a phallus shape with red chips...holding white chips, he splashed the pot, a perfect demonstration of human biology. Of course, this inspired me to recreate the female counterpart with pop up parson in the pulpit. Yeah, we've got problems.

Rubes then makes a pair of boobs...but it actually ended up looking like a lonely horizontal three. Of course, since this game is with a bunch of smart guys, the observation on Rubes' picture: "look, its omega."

So...More Quick Hits

• This week in football: lost in the first round of Fantasy playoffs, but then again, real life Ravens won. Their defense looks great, and the offense isn't terrible. Here's to continuing the winning ways.
• The Arcade Fire aren't a very good band. The lead singer, live, sounds like someone squeezing an old Mickey Rooney to 4/4 time.
• Rounders is still a great movie, especially the role played by John Turturro. The exchange in the law library is classic: Jo - Knish, how are you doing? Knish - The same.
• The zero conundrum: seeing as how linear time, according to our gregorian calendar, measures time A.D. and B.C. (or B.C.E., or whatever terminology you decide to use). Is there a year zero? or is there simply a 1BC transitioning into 1AD?
• Of the radiohead inspired late 90's, early aught bands, which was your favorite? Coldplay, Travis, Kent, Muse, Keane, Sigur Ros, etc. I don't know...I held high hope for Travis...can't stand Coldplay after their last album...Sigur Ros is a mood specific band...Muse didn't do anything while Keane attempts to pop it up. I have no comment on the defunct Kent. So the winner? Super Furry Animals? National Skyline? The damned Vines? I have no clue...this is a ridiculous line of logic.
• Someone needs to make a Sugar Hill Gang alarm clock. An episode of Scrubs featured an alarm clock with a ring of Rapper's Delight. I wish it really existed.
• Final thought: Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

How Time Flies...

...when you're having sleeping problems. Howdy, intrepid standard readers. There is much to report and commentate upon:

• NYC: Went up to the big city to help VV and his blushing bride move into their new "flat" (or apartment) on the east side of the big island. Nice neighborhood and all, but I'd say that the place really needs more shelving. Yes, and more Ikea chairs which are deceptively difficult to put together. But, VV, that aero-bed was freakin' awesome. Additionally, ELV and I visited one of her old friends residing in Brooklyn. Good peoples.
• Thoughts about NYC: I have a theory that New York causes people to draw inward into themselves. Perhaps due to the constriction in space due to living in small spaces, walking on packed sidewalks, and standing in jammed subway cars, New Yorkers seem more self-involved (for lack of a better word, since I don't mean to say involved in a negative connotation). How does one keep their sanity in the crush of humanity? Answer - pop in the ear buds, pretend that no one else exists as you talk too loud into your cell phone, bumping into people and mutter death to those who cross your path. Then again, maybe I'm just a country bumpkin who just wants people to be a little nicer in the big apple.
• According to ELV, the cupcakes from that place featured in the "Lazy Sunday" video aren't really that crazy delicious.
• Why do my iPods break down do frequently? My current theory is that my car adaptor unit may be fluctuating, thus frying the hard drive (or at least giving it a solid tweak that makes iPod fritzy).
  
• The Tenacious D concert at the Patriot Center (D.C.) was fantastic. "Wait a minute, Chuck," I hear you saying, "aren't they a joke band? Isn't it a played out joke? How could it be a good show?" Well, dear reader, often times with rock concerts, I find myself a bit bored. There's nothing really to look at unless you like oogling band members, which doesn't happen unless I'm at a Metric show, and most bands just play their songs with little to no banter, speeding through their set with about as much energy as Proust having a madeline. Yeah, excitement isn't hipster, but most hipsters tend to be boring schmucks who need to have their socks rocked off. The Tenacious D show featured most of the songs from the band's two full length releases, which if you are familiar with the songs you know that there's ample scatological and sophomoric humor. The magic of the show lies in other things: the musicianship of Kyle Gass' impressive acoustic solos, the collective skill of the backing band (Colonol Sanders on drums, Charlie Chaplin on bass, and the freaking' Antichrist on lead guitar who can shred), the set design featuring a replica of Gass' "duplex" and a stage setup of a hell bound rock band, complete with triple bass drum set on risers WITH a gong. The comedy between songs ranges from scripted banality to improvised genius, and Black fluctuates between outrageous over the top nonsense and complete heartfelt rock stardom. That's the beauty of the D; they are mocking their true love of metal. Its a mash note to Dio, Queen, the Who, and the Zep. In fact, the covers of Zep and Who, especially the incredible "Pinball Wizard" cover ending the show, demonstrated the hilarious seriousness that the D pours into their show. That love shines through, making the show both inspiring and entertaining. Best show of 2006.
• Poker home game note: spent a night fluctuating up and down, coming out a couple dollars short of even. Yeah, no big win, no big loss, just even. Here's a suggestion: if you've got a home game, don't be hard asses and institute casino rules. If the table is collecting a rake and you're serving unlimited drinks in scantily clad waitresses, then proceed with the rules about burn cards, money on table, and table talking. Otherwise, remember, its supposed to be a gathering of friends playing a damn game.
• This just in from the CBS morning show: "Sexual health is a part of general health." Thanks, Julie Chen.
• Music: apparently the Tom Waits album "Orphans" is quite good. I'll get a chance to listen to it soon and you'll read a report. Got the "Stranger than Fiction" soundtrack, and the album is pretty darn good. The Spoon contributions are excellent, and I'm glad I caught up with such an important footnote in one-hit wonders, Wreckless Eric's "Whole Wide World." DOWNLOAD THIS: Spoon "Book I Write"
• Got interested in science/technology postings on YouTube...here's the best of the lot I've found:
• Ever teacher/prof has had this fantasy. God, this is awesome!
• Some lucky SOB's seen this in real life (Vini sits back with a smug grin), but its beautiful.
• Speaking of Vini, old man DeBay would be interested in a 22 caliber disguised as a cell phone, right? Perfect for shooting rabid cats...
  
• This software is interesting, but the professor needs to jazz up his presentation skills. Maybe draw us Rube Goldberg contraption with your magic computer screen and then we'll freak out.
• Dopey Spanish television demonstration of a non-Newtonian fluid.
• The floating computer display screen is silly, since its basically a really expensive fog machine with a projector. However, when it is a interactive, touch screen fog machine, I'm more liable to wet myself.
• The damned Japanese get this kind of elevator display, and all we get in the states are pasty white boys wearing genius t-shirts.
  
• Those folks at Carneige Mellon have come up with software to convert 2D photos into three dimensional projections.
  
• Finally, there's a guy named Lasse Gjertsen who has done some interesting video editing projects. Here's my favorite two: Amateur and Hyperactive.

OK, that's enough of this.

New Movie Poster and Trailer

The teaser trailer is here.

Thanksgiving in Buffalo

Spent thanksgiving with the Vaughns up in Buffalo, New York.

ELV's parents hosted a massive dinner, inviting many friends and family. Thus, they needed a giant bird. What a bird it was: using a salt rub that kept the meat juicy and tender, the centerpiece delighted the palate and reduced me to a quivering weeper with a belly full of meat.

The food was spectacular.








Gorgeous bird!









The perfect post thanksgiving sandwich. The BIG SANDWICH, in all of its glory.






Below, random pictures of ELV, Toby the dog, and Niagara Falls.


ELV with the pooch. The dog, though a bit ornery in his old age, cuddled up with ELV on the living room couch. Love the way the sunlight spotted on ELV's face.








Cat avec turkey drumsticks.












Jayson, the roomie, in a movie scene "It Happened in Niagara."











Longer exposure of the right side of Horseshoe Falls part of Niagara Falls.